When anticipation turned to disappointment, i wished i didnt see him again.
I wished we never got back in contact.
I wished i forgot how is it like to miss somebody.
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Plans.
Adults and older people always tell the younger ones to make plans. To plan for their future, plan for their life, plan for their retirement. To make goals, to work towards goals, to achieve what they want to acheive, to be successful...
Plans? Goals? I made many, but which of it actually happened? Which of it was actually fulfilled?
I learnt ballet since when i was 4, i planned to complete till the advance stage. And what happened? I stopped ballet at Grade 7, the most stupid thing to do when i already reached that stage!
I planned to study in a girls school after PSLE. And what happened? I ended up in a neighbourhood school, something called Geylang Methodist, definately not an all girls school.
I planned to study Hospitality and Tourism Management in Temasek Polytechnic after O'levels. And what happened? I ended up taking Accounting and Finance and i totally hate accounting, not to mention, suck at finance.
I planned to further my studies in Business Management in any local university. And what happened? I ended up working in Credit Suisse, totally losing touch with studies and lecture notes.
So why plan when ultimately none of my plans work out the way i planned. Why set goals when reality differs from dreams?
Im not saying its not good to plan, i fancy people who plans for their future. But when i think further based on my own experiences, i really dont know why i made plans earlier on when nothing i planned was carried out.
Its just too hard to achieve what you really want, circumstances do cause a lot of changes dont they?
I hate myself today. I hate myself for being so moody and i hate the cause of it.
* yours truly.
amber.ruoxuan\\twenty\
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20051987\\single\\operations analyst @ credit suisse\\friendster*
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